SHIT!

I just found out that my Grandmother did in fact send a card but it was to the wrong address so it got returned to her today.
Don't I feel like the biggest bitch ever!

WTF?

My grandma forgot my b-day.
And really, I shouldn't be upset because it just makes me sound selfish, but it really hurts my feelings.
Plus, I as totally counting on her $50 to buy a new outfit for a wedding I have to go to.
I talked to her yesterday to wish her a happy b-day and nothing about my b-day was mentioned.
No, "sorry I forgot honey, your card is in the mail".
Dammit grandma!

Noise

I think my coffee may be to strong.
I almost gave myself a heart attack this morning when I came into the office. I am, of course, the first one there so it is dark and I have to make my way to the front door to turn on the lights.
While doing so this morning, I imagined someone had followed me and gotten in before the back door closed. I kept hearing these noises that I couldn't place.
Then I couldn't see anyone behind me, so it had to be a ghost.
Right?
I mean, if you are for sure hearing noises, can't see anyone, know you are alone, then it has to be that a ghost is around.
But in reality, it was the runners radio. She left it on last night.
And my imagination might be ever so heighten because I am still afraid of the dark and being alone in it.
Whatever.
I hear being scared raises your metabolism.

OUCH!!

Alan was being so super sweet last night, since it was MY birthday and all. He decided to give me a massage with my most favorite smelly lotion.
Problem?
Yes.
He kinda forgot about my whole second degree burn thing on my leg and rubbed off one of the blisters.
Smelly lotion burned my burn. I wanted to cry. But he felt really bad. And really, he didn't mean to.
But I am wondering how bad that is for the whole healing process. Any thoughts?

33 Yaupon Loop

So . . . for my b-day we went camping. Courtney's blog really sums up the experience, check it out.
thoughts-on-life.blogspot.com
I just wanted to add, that on friday while we were putting up the tents (not a good thing in the dark) I ran into the propane lamp that Alan bought us and have second degree burns on my legs.
I look like a burn victim!!!
Happy birthday me.

Carrer Woman "Kim"

I went for a second interview with a law office yesterday. My first was back in January. They filled the position with someone who had experience. They called me a few days ago wanting to know if I was still interested in a position with them. I was.
I am now a legal assistant for the law office of Bill Youngkin.
That's right.
I got the job.
I am super excited.
Wanted to pee myself.
I have dreams of greatness and a relief beyond words to know that I will not be one day without a job.
Since my old job found somebody yesterday to replace me, I don't have to finish my last week. And well, of course Mr. Youngkin wants me to start working as soon as I can.
Which will be Monday.
Monday I shall start a new life.
Or so it feels.

Downer-one of the lawyers called me Kim. Do I correct him on Monday or just let it be?

I give you 4.25 stars!

I just got back from San Antonio.
Alan and I went on a mini vacation to celebrate our two-year anniversary. Neither of us had a clue what to get one another, so we took a trip.
So much fun.
Went to the Zoo. Saw some monkeys and turtles.
Ate some Mexican food on the river. Walked around. Ate some more Mexican food on the river. Very good there you know.
And then last night around 11pm the fire alarm goes off in our hotel and they evacuate everyone. I am yelling at Alan to hold on and don't leave I am sans bra and am not evacuating till I get one on.
So there we are, sitting under trees on a rock ledge, in our pjs, with birds pooping on us. But at least I hadn't been evacuated from my reception and can't sit down because of my oh so very white dress. Poor girl. Actually, there were three of them.
We finally get to go in after an hour of watching the firemen calmly and slowly walk into and out the hotel several times. Looking like they weren't working at all.
We have to take the stairs. I get claustrophobic when elevators are really packed.
Did I tell you we were on the ninth floor?
Plus side: We wake up to a letter telling us last night's stay will be reduced by fifty percent because of the inconvenience caused by one of their air conditioners blowing up.
Also, they only charged us for one day of valet parking.

Career Change???

I quit my job.
That's right.
In three weeks I shall have a new job.
Or I shall be a nervous wreck trying to find one.
Whichever it is, I feel so free right now. I feel like I can do anything. I can accomplish whatever task I set my mind to. I feel like I am a new and happier woman.
I feel a little nauseated. That could be from the amount of coffee I have just had on an empty stomach though.
I won't let it worry me. Not today.
The first day I search for a new or improved position in life!
If it is not to much trouble, please send good vibes my way. Feeling a little apprehensive. Starting to second guess myself.
Damn mind. Stop thinking!

Zachery Alan

My friend Heather had her baby. July 13th. He was 8 lbs 2 oz and 20 and a quarter inches long.
Her and her husband Brett have this glow about them that is undescribable. If that's a word.
I am such the envious person these days.
Zach is perfect. And so tiny. And I already love him so very much.
It is so different to be an "aunt" to a friend's baby then it is to your siblings. I am much more afraid of messing up.
I wish I had a picture to download. I can't even explain the beauty of this child.

Gas Station It Is

I have this friend. I won't tell you his name because I am honestly going to describe something he should be ashamed of. He won't because that is the kind of guy he is. But he should be.
He lives about two hours from me. So before I get on the road to his house I had coffee and a huge diet coke. About ten minutes from his house I have to potty. Naturally. Well, Paige is with me and she has been to his house. She informs me that it might be in my best interest to use a gas station bathroom. Seriously??!! Yuck! The town we are in is certainly not known for their cleanliness.
I can't find suitable gas station.
"Are you sure it is that bad?" I ask her innocently. I mean, he is a boy, so it probably isn't clean, but I've done worse.
So we arrive and he points me in direction of bathroom.
The floor is dirty, potty not so bad.
I have decided I will attempt usage.
It has a smell I can't really place.
I sit on toilet.
It moves.
A lot.
I thought I had broken the damn thing.
It almost threw me off.
I had to brace myself by holding my hands against the wall in front of me.
Which isn't clean either by the way.
Then, when I have managed to wipe and stay on toilet without dripping on myself, I go to flush. But it won't.
I have to reach my hand in the tank part and pull up on the chain.
Didn't I feel classy.
After I rinsed my hands I noticed there was nothing to wipe them off on, except for the crusted towels lying about.
I passed. My jeans worked well enough.

Rethinking

I have really been good about getting up in the morning and going to walk/jog and then some mornings following that with a little Pilates. But I am rethinking the whole thing.
Reasons?
There are few. But what else do I have to complain about?
1. I haven't lost any weight because of exercise
2. My heart does not feel healthier
3. I am tired
4. I am hungrier during the day
5. Odd muscles are randomly sore
6. I get freaked out every morning when leaving my complex because this totally strange person has taken to putting out a statue of an Owl at dusk and removing it before the sun totally comes up. I know this is a statue. But the damn thing scares me nonetheless.
7. A skunk almost got me yesterday. Fast little critter.
8. And today, I saw a bug that would be the devil if the devil were in bug form. I almost stepped on it. Instead I veered and screamed. I'm sure the people who live in that neighborhood were thankful that I alerted them to the dangerous bug situation so early in the morning.

Texas Pneumatic Tools

For years now, I have passed a place called Texas Pneumatic Tools on my way home and to my grandmother's house. I never really thought about it. It was just one of those nice red brick complexes with manicured lawns and high white iron fences.
So yesterday on our way back from Dallas, Alan is driving and I start to think about this Pneumatic Tools place.
Well, seing as how I am stupid and and unlearned about anything except what is already in my own little world, I ask him, "what is that place?"
He informs me that Texas Pneumatic Tools is what we laymen would refer to as a looney bin.
Strange.
Not sure if I totally believe him.
He knows I am gulliable so he could be telling me anything.
But then again, that would explain the fences.
Does anyone know for sure?
Tell me. Please.

Whenever I drive for a long period of time, my mind automatically switches to deep mode and I address feelings and thoughts that I normally suppress because I have not the time to entertain them.
Point.
I realized this weekend as I was driving to Houston, and much of the surrounding cities, that I miss my friends.
Of course I have some friends in town that I talk to and hang out with. But I miss my college friends. We were such a fun circle. And I really don't feel like myself without them in my life.
Damn, I hate growing up.
I miss Courtney and the crazy way she had of making something ordinary into something funny or dramatic.
I miss Laurie and her quiet reserved manner. And the way she could never poop unless she was alone in the dorm.
I miss Shana "in the raw". You always knew exactly how she felt about something. That girl rarely holds back.
I miss Sandra and her constipation.
I miss Dianne and her prim and proper way.
I miss Lisa. My first best friend. The girl who taught me it was okay to be silly and okay to be myself. Even if the world wasn't ready for me.
No matter who I meet or make friends with now doesn't compare to these ladies. And I miss them with all my being.
And I miss who I was with them around.

*sigh*

Ok
10 days
I spent 10 days in a luxurious suite at the fabulous Rio Hotel and Casino.
I miss it already.
Was totally glad to be back in the same time zone as my hubby and to spend some alone time with him. But Vegas totally spoke to my wild, carefree side. I was actually sad when we were driving away. I left a piece of myself there.
So much happened, I can't even begin to blog about.
But there is one night I must share.
Lisa came to visit the first weekend we were there. Super cool. So much fun. We got to see naked men together.
Anyhoo, the first night she gets there we go to the Voodoo club. It is on the 51st floor of the Rio and it has an outside part where you can hang out and look at all of Vegas.
It was awesome.
We arrive, get our drinks, scope out a spot to stand and begin to catch up on friend business and what not.
Two guys approach us. One guy, we will call him Mike (I think that was really his name, can't be sure) had totally been eyeing Lisa before so I knew he was wanting to talk to her.
They come to us under the pretense that Mike's friend needed my help to dance because he was so completely awful. Which was true. I watched him do the robot stuff. I told him to stop. He didn't. It was bad.
Anyhoo, we end up meeting all of Mike's friends and hanging with them all night. Good guys. Liked them a lot. Especially because this one guy Joe totally tried to protect me when this really scary old guy was harassing me.
What old guy? you may be saying. I shall tell.
I go the bar, Lisa needs a long island ice tea, I might as well get a beer.
Guy who is at least 60, with horrid teeth, drunk off his ass, in 1970's jacket gets extremely close to me and tells me that I smell great. "Thanks"
"No, really. Just wonderful. Can I buy you a drink?"
"No thanks, I already have a tab."
"What about a hotel? Can I buy you a hotel?"
"Um, no, I already have one."
"Really?"
"Ya, a whole one."
I then place my order while he continues to get closer, unaware of the dread and fear that I believe was apparent in my eyes and the not so subtle way I continued to press my self against the bar in hopes to distance myself.
He then begins to rub my back.
Eww! Stop! Does anyone see this????
They do not.
Old nasty then picks up my drink.
"That's mine!"
"Oh sorry" Slaps down a hundred.
"No, that's ok, I already paid for it."
"Well, fine then." He says this with a little bit of an attitude, like I was rude to him or something!
I run back to group. Tell Joe. He stands in the way to block Old nasty's view of me.
A shower was needed.
But wait. It gets better.
Lisa, Paige and I are at the pool the next day. I go to the bar (maybe that was my problem) to get Paige a strawberry margarita.
And who is sitting at the end on a bar stool . . . drunk???
That's right. Old nasty.
He yells hey little girl at me. I ignore. Grab drink. And practically knock over some waitress on my haste to return to my lounge chair and rid myself of the disgusting feeling that has washed over me.
That was just one day. You can imagine the rest of the trip.

Two Things

Yesterday was bizarro day!
First, the pen psycho came back. That's right. I talked to him this time.
I saw him walking by the store (talking to himself) and I knew he was the guy who stole our pens. So I hid our pen container under the counter in case he came in. He did.
He begins to explain that he is looking for this certain pen. Called an Oric. He shows me one he has in his pocket. It is really beat up and the ink part is broken so I know it doesn't work.
But you can tell he is totally in love with this pen. He has a two handed grip on it. I am pretty sure he would have gone crazy if I had tried to take the pen from him at all.
Then he grills me about where he will find this pen and do we have any pens.
"Your all out of medical pens? Your all out of pens?"
Yes, I tell him. No pens here!
He then turns around to leave, talking to himself, "Okay see you later" he yells, and then resumes talking to himself.
I think he may be a schizophrenic. Such strange behavior!
Are schizophrenics dangerous?
Second, Paige got bitched out by a complete stranger in the parking lot of her tanning salon. She was walking to her car after she had tanned and apparently these two women were waiting outside in their car and one started yelling, "your gonna get tan like a mexican. Stupid mexican!" And other such things. While the other just sat and laughed. That's not funny . . . that's stupid.
So weird. Why do you care strange women?
Do you work for the skin cancer people?
Don't you think there is a better way to go about warning people than to spout racial slurs and what not?
Bizarro day indeed.

Calendar Jealousy

Every year for Christmas Alan and I exchange calendars. He usually gives me something with turtles or cats.
I give whatever I feel would be fun for the year. This year I picked him up a Sports Illustrated swim suit calendar.
Now I hate myself.
Gorgeous, skinny women now peer down at me when I am using the computer.
They seem to say, "You need to get up and not sit so much" "You know, your never going to look like I do in your swim suit this year" "Did you see my stomach? I totally have a six pack. Let's see yours"
Stupid calendar!!

Daisy Fuentes says it works

Paige and I started the Winsor Pilates tapes this morning. We are determined to do it at least three times this week, then we can see if they really work. So excited. I shall have "longer, leaner and stronger muscles"!!
Mari Winsor is the instructor for this video. She says things like squeeze your buttocks and engage your powerhouse. Which normally would not be entertaining, but at the early hour, I find it quite humorous.
It takes me back to when I used to do the ab videos with Tony. I used to yell obscenities at the tv and tell Tony I hated him. God, what fun.
Lisa and I did his video New Years Eve one year, before we went out of course.
The next day we had to drive to her family get together. Well, three hours in a car is bound to bring out some laughter with the two of us. I thought I was gonna die. My abs ached so much and I couldn't stop laughing at whatever she said!
As soon as we got there we both crawled into a recliner and took a much needed nap.
Where did my Tony tape go?

SPO

So, I am afraid to go to work today. And every day from now on I fear I will be hesitant to go. Yesterday a police officer came to visit.
Upon my request.
We had a suspicious character come into the store. He had come in the day before asking about employment. He walks in yesterday, says he has never been here and just wants to look around. The entire time he was there I felt extremely uncomfortable and he was asking all sorts of questions that were making me think he was there looking around, but for another purpose all together.
He actually asked us if we were ever busy and when that was!
After he left I called the non emergency number and an officer came out to take my statement.
He filed a Suspicious Persons Observation (SPO). He also felt the need to be completely honest with me and say that he believes this person will be back to rob us and he will hit us hard and fast.
I'm sorry. What????
I thought up till that point that I was just paranoid.
It is now apparent to me that my life is in danger.
What if he just comes in and shoots and doesn't do that whole "if you don't move you won't get hurt" thing?
Honestly, my mind in rampant with death and seriously injured scenarios. I am really really scared.

Where am I again?

We went out to eat on Friday night to the Black Eyed Pea.
For a while we were boycotting because they had really crappy service and had down sized their portions while raising prices.
But we were all really hungry and decided we did not want to have to wait to be seated. Only place we could think of to eat that we would not have to wait forever . . . The Pea.
So, we have a pretty good meal. There are leftovers. We ask for a to-go box. Waiter brings box.
Box is in fact a Whataburger box. It says Whataburger with the little picture of a Whataburger and the motto that has something to do with not making till you order.
Ummm . . .
That's really weird.
Are they owned by Whataburger? Did someone already use this container and they cleaned it out and gave it to us trying to save money? Where we actually eating at Whataburger and did not notice?
I don't think I will go back, at least not right away.

Revalations

I went home this weekend. There was yet another baby shower to attend. I guess it is just that time in my life for babies. A few years ago there were tons of weddings.

I have a three hour drive to and a three hour drive back, which gives me a lot of time to think, especially since hubby did indeed stay at home.
And I don't know if it is because I am extra moody/sensitive or if I accidentally got some acid in my food, but I had quite the weekend of revelations.
Let me share.


Revelation #1
-I adjust my ETA according to every sign that tells me how many miles to my destination. Always. Ever since I can remember I have done this.


Revelation #2
-I am extremely sensitve and need to grow some "thicker skin".


Revelation #3
-I care what EVERYBODY thinks about me. I really really want to be acccepted by any and everyone I come in contact with. And I rarely feel that I am.


Revelation #4
-I totally believe in soulmates.


Revelation #5
-There is nothing I can do to help my family stop disliking each other. I need to change my outlook instead of letting the situation make me so sad that I am sick to my stomach.


Revelation #6
-My favorite food is Ritz Chicken. And Pizza. And fried chicken. And pasta. I like food.